day fifteen: back. but not on track yet.

my speed lowered.
my time got up.

lifted to stationary bicycle = 30x
sit ups = 40x

i still feel the toe. nothing serious but the cut got wet.
not a very conducive condition for healing.
just annoyed that it interrupts my workout.  

day fourteen: who put that there?

no workout today.

had hurt my toes after walking into a wall.
yep this time it's a real wall.
i didn't notice it at first but apparently there's a 2cm long gash. lucky for me it was not so deep.

dang.

day thirteen: and the wall falls down.

the self-sympathy wall is down.

manage to go for brisk walking and jogged for about 200m(ish)
[a start at the very least/and the pants stayed on this time lol]

it was a time to think as well. i now stand resolute and steady!

BRING IT ON!!!

day twelve: damn these cravings.

still having cravings. feeling melancholic since last night.

need to find a better way to let go of these feelings. if i can't all the workout will go to waste.

didn't go through with workout today. i need a long walk to ease this melancholy off.

days eight/nine/ten/eleven: the hiatus

i can only summarize my absence as a melancholic journey. very emotional. and it hurts too.

what had supposed to be a birthday celebration; turned sour. i feel helpless that i can't do anything about it.

lost. sad. vilified.

but on the bright side though. i managed to suppress the desire to eat my feelings.

day seven: SOS

today i felt like hitting a wall.

i was angry almost half of the day. it felt like everyone is ganging up on me in making me angry(i only felt like that. the truth is there were only 3-4 people kept getting on to my nerve.)

and almost everytime when i'm upset (be it angry, nervous or sad) i felt hungry. it had always made me wonder why. but then lo and behold and wouldn't you know it, on my way back from work i heard this public service announcement over the radio about cravings.

and then i felt like i've been slapped right in the face.
Apparently your cravings are more related to you emotionally rather than hunger. it happens when in some state in your life you tend to eat away your feelings rather than dealing with it in a proper way. such things would actually take time to develop a subconscious trigger between your feelings and your cravings.

(we often hear this, "i eat a lot when i am nervous" or "i eat a lot when i'm sad")

i had hit that wall today. i was so angry, i ate. i ate few slices of pizza and a pepsi at 9pm after dinner(in which i have set it at 6pm.)

but lucky enough after chatting gibberish with my 1-year-old daughter, she got me back on track. i'm actually doing this for her as well.

at 1130pm. i managed to break the wall. like free willy i was.

and i broke one more thing too.

10 km cycling : 22mins 50secs. (YEAAAY 2 mins faster)
20(ish)kg lifts= 20x
sit ups= 40x

 

day six: the good, the bad and the ugly.

power cycling: 10km
lifts (20kg[ish]): 20x
sit ups: 40x

work-out machines at home.

the GOOD 

you get to work-out at home. you wont be interrupted by the weather. 

too hot outside? its ok. you can do it at home. 

raining? it's ok, you can do it at home.

time wise, Day or night is not an issue. literally it will be there at your disposal anytime you want.

the BAD

lack of inspiration or the motivation to keep you going. 

refer to my previous entry. 

i'm not denying that anyone who owns those machines lacks the inspiration. it was the inspiration and motivation itself that made them buying those machines. but they did it maybe the most at one or two weeks and they stop. (the same thing happened to me when my stationary bike long time ago: guilty)

the UGLY

er.. how much did you spend for it again? 

yep my point exactly.

and it would be worse if you leave it there gathering dust and not using it